Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Things aren't always as they seem...

Sometimes it simply hurts to breath... and yet I find myself finding the strength to face another day and pretend that it isn't happening to us.  Denial?... call it what you will but it gets me through each day.

I want to be a mom.  Its that simple... and yet its so completely difficult.  

We've been told that IVF is the answer.  Pretty cut and dry... no in between... 

Its hard to not let it consume me.  I don't want to be "that girl"... the crazy baby lady.  Most days it remains bottled up... simmering under the surface waiting for someone to make sense of it all.   

So, today I decided to finally give myself a release.  When I joined this site I wondered what I would write about and found myself shying away from posting because the idle chatter of my daily life just didn't seem worth sharing.  But, I think that putting the words out there... even if only for myself to read will somehow ease the burden placed on my heart.

So for now I remain... Angry. Bitter. Jealous... Hopeful...